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  • Writer's pictureAnna Granta

ADHD relationships

ADHD and relationships can be hard, yet the nature of having a "spiky profile" is that we usually work best as part of a supportive team. It's true at work and it's also true at home.

What is a spiky profile? A spiky profile is a pattern of strengths and weaknesses which is more pronounced than normal. Someone with a spiky profile has especially strong strengths, as well as greater struggles in areas of weakness. Neurodivergent people have spiky profiles which means that it's crucial for us to discover and use our strengths while avoiding too many tasks that rely on our weaknesses.

How do you avoid weaknesses?

One way to avoid your weaknesses is to have someone else support you with those tasks. That might mean hiring a cleaner, personal assistant, or professional trainer. It might mean eating ready meals or takeaway. Or finding a great accountability partner (share this free training with them).

Having someone on your team who can take the tasks you hate, while you do the things you're better at, is another way to avoid weak areas. A supportive partner, housemate, etc can be a huge advantage as an ADHDer.

What if my relationship is a source of stress not support?

Movies tell us that if you have a relationship with someone you care about, all your troubles will magically disappear. Unfortunately you may have discovered that this isn't the case.

The good news is, there are strategies that can help you both to understand each other better, to co-create solutions and build a life that allows you both to thrive.

There is a shortage of well qualified relationship therapists in the UK, even more so of neurodiversity informed therapists. This is why I've partnered with Julia Wallace, ADHDer and renowned relationship therapist. I'm hosting a free event "ADHD couples create a thriving partnership when one (or both) of you have ADHD."

At this event Julia will share powerful free tips for strengthening your relationship and explain how you can work more deeply with her if you wish.

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